Cheat Work Thursday

"AFTER THE RAIN" The finale thankfully skips the annoying, unnecessary cliffhangers. So, that's great. Except for the identity of the new Lord Featherington, it pretty much concludes all of its storylines: Marina Phillip Crane arrives bearing the devastating news that George Crane, who was, in fact, loyal and in love with Marina all along, has died on the battlefield. He offers Marina his hand in marriage in his brother's place to which Marina declines because she "doesn't know and love the man". Also -- we're sure this is just a small factor -- she's no longer with child now, so nobody needs saving, thank you. For five minutes. Because false alarm. The tea shockingly didn't work, and as she's back to being pregnant again, we helplessly watch her board Phillip's carriage, accepting the man's proposal. She asks Portia how did she stay married without love for so long. "You find things to love, my dear. Small thin...

"OCEANS APART" The episode deals with the aftermath of "Swish" . Daphne and Simon are in a cold war, sending messages via footmen during dinner, and dueling over loud piano and pigeon shooting (we're not judging this activity enough, btw). It's a far cry from the first time we saw them at the super long table, when they were living recklessly, dismissing outdated customs and moving chairs closer (gasp!) because they just couldn't keep their hands off each other. Then Whistledown drops the Colin-Marina news, and they have to continue the war in London as Simon insists on returning with Daphne. Apparently, Colin is not over Marina. His family has to put their foot down, stopping him from visiting her to distance themselves from the scandal. Arrives the new Duchess of Hastings with a plan: she's betting on people to deviate to talking about her and Simon instead, now that they've returned. And when she sees how distraught Colin is, she offer...

"SWISH" I was naive to think that Clyvedon was Simon's house; the huge castle that Daphne is soon eager to redecorate is one of his estates . Anyway, it looks like they are only there for the honeymoon. The newlyweds arrive, and the world -- including the housekeepers and the protocols -- is just a background. Life is perfect and the air has been cleared, so what's left to do is just have sex everywhere all the time -- on the library's ladder, at the park in front of the ducks, at night in the rain at the mausoleum. Daphne can't wait to do all the Duchess stuff too, being noble-y and touching people's hearts with her kindness and knowledge and plans. Unfortunately, her lavender-goggled eyes getting into the role -- that includes her pardoning three pigs from being slaughtered -- starts her off on the wrong foot with her new housekeeper Mrs Colson and her subjects around Clyvedon. Back in London, young Colin announces his engagement to Miss Marina ...